C.R.E.A.M. #33 Free Cucumbers, Aston Martin Hatchbacks and American Cars

0:00 Introduction and Free Cucumbers

This happened last night, left here and went

to the local BP station, walked in,

got some fuel, and walked up to the counter,

and it was a middle-aged woman,

and she went, "Oh,

do you want free cucumber?"

Hello, and welcome back to the 33rd Cars Rule

Everything Around Me podcast with myself,

Edwin, William to my left, and Ben Hamine.

Hello.

Very nice.

That was a clean one.

I liked seeing all week.

At the beginning of every single Cars Rule

Everything Around Me podcast,

we asked, answer the question,

have Cars ruled or ruined everything around us?

I have a feeling I know it's about to happen.

William, what's he meant to ruin for me this week?

What was that?

I wasn't planning on it being a ruin.

We're what, two or three days after Shedfest?

Yes.

So the big show with Autoalex and Co,

everyone involved here, it'll be a little bit

up behind for you.

We're a week behind.

Yeah.

If you were there, you will have noticed that

for about half a day, I wasn't there.

Yeah, I was by myself in the 10 for quite a while.

I left at about seven o'clock in the morning,

get down to Goodwood, nice and early,

in the Mégane, I'd just done some fixes in

the two days prior to that, cleaned it,

it was just, I was excited to get out for the first time.

And then maybe 20 minutes from mine,

I was just about to jump on the M25,

I went to change gear and the clutch pedal

stayed on the floor.

Just, and I already knew what it was,

there's a, I had to replace a clutch line

recently and basically when it's not secured

properly, that's what it does,

the line just goes, and just pisses fluid everywhere.

So I knew, as soon as it happened,

I just knew, I was like, and I knew I

couldn't fix it there, like,

outside of the road, I was like,

I'm done.

So I had to get recovered, back home,

waited two hours for recovery,

got recovered, there was a little bit of up

in the air about that, 'cause the car's quite

low, the guy came and he yummed and awed and

he scratched his chin a bit,

and then 20 homes, he blew my house down,

he blew my day off.

Oh, geez.

But yeah, it took the car back.

Jonathan Wain driver did the turn a bit hours

journey again.

Started it again, down to Goodwood.

So it's not the end of the world.

No, it just wasn't ideal.

There was also a worrying amount of people

that said, ah, he could have just driven on that.

Sorry.

Oh, great.

Yeah, so I did say it is a French gearbox.

Yeah.

I'm sure there is a way to drive without a clutch.

Absolutely, but not in France.

The two and a half hours down to Goodwood

through backwards, we're changing gear in five seconds.

A bit of traffic and I'm done.

You're done.

But you did make it at the end.

You were there.

It was fine.

Four or five hours late and it was fine.

I did say, I think I said on stage at the

time, I got picked up by the recovery guy.

And so it was me and my girlfriend in this

like three seats in the van.

So it was quite tight in there.

We were just talking about stuff.

He was telling me about cars and whatever else.

And he went, yeah, that amount of joints

don't work for himself.

Yeah, he

had no idea about TDC, which was actually

quite

nice to be fair.

It sounds quite vague.

It's rare.

But no,

it's quite nice when you can organically

introduce it to

someone.

I could just have a breakdown in peace.

Did you say, but you may not know TDC,

but you are a creamer.

Yeah, I said, look, buddy, I'm a big creamer.

Hey, if you were there and you came along and

you came up to us and proudly said,

I am a creamer, it never gets any less funny.

No, it's really quite funny when just someone.

Also, I did at one point, someone came up,

they said it from maybe five or 10 meters away.

And I watched someone who clearly had no idea

what was going on, look around in complete

shock and disgust.

Also, a massive thank you.

And this is an offence to the older lady who

gifted us a pack of custard creams.

Thank you.

So, you know what, we chatted down on them.

Yeah, we had them.

So, if there was any poison in that,

they'd better not be.

Because we won't be back next week.

It hasn't worked.

I didn't understand the joke.

And we went back into like, we had like an

area away from like the standard stuff where

we could be.

And we sat in there after everything ended.

And I was like, I'm kind of honest,

I don't know what, I don't know what the joke was.

And the lady's pause went, Cream!

And that makes sense.

That it was, there was a light bulb moment for you.

Yeah, truly.

So, it's a ruin for you.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Benjamin, it's a rule for me.

Because, you know what, I pulled off and that

was a little clear there.

Oh, yeah, you were looking good.

He was growing too, Ben.

We had to give him some encouragement.

We had to say, look, little day out,

your first actual proper show with the boys?

We did, who didn't feel?

Yeah, but this is like a big big show.

First big boy.

Yeah, first big boy show.

Yeah, Cleo was out.

Yeah, Cleo was out.

Yeah, Cleo was out.

Cleo looked great.

I had it washed, went for a little scratch and shine.

Lovely.

Yeah, I did the three hour, two and a half,

three hour journey down there in comfort and style.

So, in comfort.

Do you want actually fun?

Just, I wouldn't want to drive it up and down

like to here.

You wouldn't want to drive it two and a half,

three hours away.

No, it was fine.

Yeah, me and my girlfriend were perfectly

happy in there.

It wasn't allowed to be fair.

Now we did have a curry afterwards.

Ben, did you fall asleep all the way home?

No, I was very safe.

I don't talk about driving on this podcast.

5:22 Ben's Driving Jokes and Apologies

You don't know.

I will not mention any form of driving,

but it was fine.

There was that you weren't held to anyone up.

Less hand lane, six miles an hour.

Were you undertaking?

No, no, no, no.

If there was someone there, I would have gone

round them by the highway code states.

Of course, Ben has set off camera.

He is no longer ever talking about driving again.

The episode where Ben explained that it was

not a doctor, he's yet to go out.

So we don't yet know what your real response is.

Ben could be due another apology.

And he's missed that week.

Exactly.

So he hasn't apologized yet.

And now he's just come on as if nothing's wrong.

This is when the next one the previous one

goes out and the doctor comments and says,

Hey, it's the footage of Ben passing me.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I think what I'll do, should I just do an

apology just in case?

Just in case.

No, no, no, can you do get one for the

doctor, which you know you should apologize for?

Because, yeah, because you know,

but then can you just give us a freestyle?

Sorry for something that might come up.

I'm really sorry for do you want to give me something?

I apologize for it.

What about that time when you were whacking

golf balls off the bridge on the M4,

just enter on coming balls?

That was quite crazy when you did that,

Ben.

You need to stop doing that.

The swing is immaculate.

People who think that's true.

It's not true.

It's true.

I will no longer mention driving on this podcast.

Ben, I think you were whacking golf balls and

they were going on the M4, but you weren't aiming there.

A little golf joke for Ben.

So it's a it's a rule.

Yeah, people walking up to you and saying,

I'm a creamer, never, ever, ever gets easier.

It's because it I don't know what I can never

get my brain in the state where I understand.

No, yes.

I mean, I go, what?

What are you talking about?

It's wonderful.

Please do not stop.

Now, we're quite excited about this week's

podcast sponsor because it is a brand that

Edwin and I, Ben as well, have been using for

years because today's sponsor is Vax.

Yeah, Vax have been a instrumental part in

keeping basically all of our cars clean.

I used to look at my interiors and be like,

that's clean.

And then we got sent one for previous job.

Yeah.

And good God.

I've used it.

I'd say upwards of a hundred times.

So I've used it on the above.

I've used it at my parents' house on dogs.

Dogs make messes, not on the dogs themselves,

but on, you know, things like dog store and

stains that they make.

Yeah.

And humans make stains too.

Part of the reason they're so good is because

they are, it's not just water and a vacuum.

They have a Vax solution that you mix in and

it is very good at getting incredibly tough,

hard to get out stains just fully out.

But they sent us out a spot wash max pet design.

Yeah.

They now has some extra attachments and one

of those attachments actually makes it a dry

vacuum as well.

Yeah.

So it means there's a little chamber that

catches all the sort of debris and stuff and

it's really, really good for interior stuff.

Like down the side of your seat in the cracks

of your seats in little tiny crevices in the vents.

Yeah.

It just collects all that dirt in a little

chamber and you can check it all the way.

But we literally used it on,

if you're watching, you can see the golf

behind us, which we've obviously talked about

in this podcast, but we will get onto more in

future that that was quite horrendous inside.

And we said, oh, this is perfect.

We'll use the Vax on it.

And the water was not good.

It was quite dark.

It was a horrible little latte.

Oh, I've used it previously on my Range Rover.

I had one, I have one at home that I use on

the Range Rover because it's got a light

interior, the headline is like a light beige

and the bit in the back and it's all carpet and stuff.

Used it on there.

Just pulls all the stains out.

Yeah, same.

My 11.

Oh, we used that on the 9/11.

We used that on the above.

Ben used that on the brown barge.

Brown barge from early on, podcast was used on.

My dad actually meshed me this week and said,

can you please bring it with you when you

come to see me this weekend?

Because he spilled coffee on the floor.

Nice.

And that car, when you got it,

it smelled real rough.

By the time you'd been over it with Vax,

it was new car smell was bad.

It was a lot better.

Yeah.

There's not only like products for cars,

obviously we're focused on cars.

I used it before at home when I moved out of

my old place.

I used one of the bigger Vax products to do carpets.

So I don't have to pay a professional

millions of pounds to do it because they just

got everything.

Yeah, does it?

Yeah.

I mean, they work incredibly well.

So thank you very much, Vax,

for sponsoring us.

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It is a rule for me as well,

simply because I, the weekend before,

so whenever we filmed this podcast last,

which was maybe a Thursday, I had no idea

what car was going to take to Shedfest.

And then I thought, you know what,

screw it.

I'm going to put in the work to get my

weighty 36 done, which involved quite a lot

involved taking the subframe out of one,

taking the subframe out of the other,

swapping them around, installing them both,

and then doing the same on the rear subframes.

It's not a small job.

And so I was here on Friday night,

I decided to go for it, took the subframe

out, was struggling, and our landlord,

Trevor, who he's talked about before,

the Top Gear Trove, again, still doesn't,

I know a lot of you were asking,

he would never, he will never come to the

podcast, but we can relay things.

He walked in, he went, what are you doing?

I was like, explain, he went,

we're never going to do that by herself,

I'll give you a hand, and helped me swap

subframes on anything.

He's never touched one in his life,

but he was like, I hope you're on that.

And then so I was here until like,

at a eight p.m., buttoning it up,

trying to get it ready, drove it back to my

parents' place, and I was like,

hmm, caliper's a little bit sticky,

but that seems fine.

It was bad, it was sticky.

I had to pull over four times all the way to

Goodwood to let my brakes cool,

'cause the caliper was stuck on,

made it there, and then asked,

we went for a carry, I was the first to

leave, you guys were just behind me,

and then five minutes later,

I was on the side of the road,

pulled over waiting for the cool down,

I saw a clear one, eight two,

and a rain drove a fry past me.

But overall, I was there and I'm happy,

it runs, I'm excited.

It's a rule then.

It's a rule, it's all right.

Yeah, yeah.

'Cause it would've been the white one,

why are you 36?

It would've been so good.

It would've looked very good.

It would've looked very good.

I can still have Ron Grey, one,

eight two.

And the silver one on curb smashed wheels.

Oh, Ben, not happy about that.

It's not very nice, isn't it?

Not really relevant, isn't it?

So, that's our Rule and Ruin for the week.

As always, let us know yours.

What do we have to start with on our

anecdotes and news?

Do we have news?

We are a new, there are news is,

and 'cause something happened somewhere in

Europe, or some things.

Take fancy people, nice cars.

Mr.

Colmover.

Yes, Mr.

Colmover.

Mr.

Colmover.

Ah, sorry, yeah, okay, anyway.

11:38 BMW News and Updates

Ben, you've run here M2CS.

I'll be honest, I've heard nothing of this.

Now, guess what, people, if you're listening,

nothing's gonna seem different,

but if you're watching, you might see that

there is "Fallza Horizon 2" on the screen.

The second, sometimes tied best for me,

but incredibly good.

Not only that, hey, we've got photos on the screen.

I've got my laptop out.

So, here we go.

Oh, I have seen the, I don't know what,

oh wow.

I saw

someone take a bit, I thought it was

aftermarket, so this is a C.S.

This is a C.S.

They announced at Concorde, Concorde.

Concorde, Concorde.

The plane, what is it called?

The

fancy event of Lake Como, I do not like the

grills, it looks stupid.

I like the grills.

I don't mind the grills.

I like the kit, I like the seats,

I do not like that ductile.

You know what, I really like the ductile.

The ductile's not, look, E46 CSL is the ductile.

Exactly, he blends

perfectly into the lines of the car,

as he does sort of, but why does he,

they've sort of blended it upwards and then

it just goes straight across.

The CSL one's perfect 'cause it just arcs

smoothly over, it's just wonderful.

What I've just seen though here is this front

lip, that is lovely, that is what front lips

should be, you know what that is?

That is, this is great having this screen,

apologies for your,

Oh no, okay.

I am on it, wasn't it?

I was worried about what was about to get to him.

He's an E36 LTW spliffer, like the,

you know the angry, the little up-down flick there.

That's what he's giving me vibes of,

that's cool.

Okay, I like that, any more information?

You have anything more?

Probably more power, probably a bit more

track-focused, I'd imagine.

I don't actually know.

CSL is normally that halfway house they've

got sort of, who is, is they go have a little

bit of Alcantara.

Have some of that, have some Alcantara,

and we'll put CS.

Now let me ask Jamie to pull that up.

Can we get some specs, perhaps?

What's different about it?

Oh, that's great for me to know.

I'm not doing that.

Okay.

I'm just here for photos.

Okay, fair.

So we don't know.

But that's you, if information is you,

photos is me.

Okay, that's fine, well we've got that sorted out now.

We are your go-to source for car news.

None of us know.

Just please Google it.

We're just on photos.

You all know as much as we do.

Probably better.

Does anyone know anything about anything?

Probably not.

It gets 50 more horsepower.

Okay, it's a faster.

Yeah.

We can make an educated guess that there's

probably some more power.

It has 50, I don't know where it started.

I'm gonna say it has 500, here's a guess.

It makes 563 horsepower.

That's great.

I think it's 490.

Okay, interesting.

Someone in the comments.

Okay, cool, so that's our, is that all of the

news or is that there is?

No, there is actually another news that's BMW

related that I saw.

Wow, that's not much these days.

That's not much to.

That was barely worth me researching.

Ben, and more news from you.

I don't know if you have any information on

this or are you just gonna lie or.

Absolutely.

You've got the Bovin Siipan Zagato.

Yes.

Why I first read that.

And here it is on the screen.

I thought it was.

Now, this is, is it?

That's a four-series on M4.

Yes.

It is a body kit.

It's an M4, yes.

And so Bovin Siipan, if you don't know,

is the family behind Alpina.

Yeah, yeah, so it's the company to BMW.

And now we're

making a new company.

And so they have rebodied an M4.

That

is the front.

And there is the back looking a lot like a

watch dog's car.

That's got the CSL there.

The laser lights, yeah, the LED.

I don't like this.

Maybe do it at all.

That's a pleasure.

Yep.

See, you know what, if that wasn't a BMW,

I think I'd be okay with it.

But because I know that that's just based on

a BMW M4, it just feels like in knock-off GTA

watch dogs behind the car.

He has an engine.

He has an engine, I believe,

and I believe it has four wheels with driving gears.

I don't know what the engine is.

I'm no idea.

Benjamin, engine.

This is Ben's News on just before I would

imagine it has an M4 engine.

Now can I please point to me out that's

really upsetting me about this?

Please.

Can we go to the rear photo?

I've just closed it, so no.

Okay, I can't make my point then.

So you must remember it.

Is it a convertible, this one?

No, no.

Why is it then?

Why does it have a line?

Does it have a line up there?

If you look at the rear photo,

we have to get off a line there.

That's what I mean, that's what,

and it was annoying me.

It looks like when you get an MX-5 or an S2K

or something.

Maybe you can convert it back to a full series.

But you put, it's when you have the hard top

you put on, and then you have that weird line

at the bottom of the rear window,

where it doesn't flow into the rest of chassis.

It has that.

I really don't like it.

I don't know where that number plate is,

and I also don't like that.

If you took the number plate off,

it would look even worse.

Why does it look lifted?

Also, there are gonna be people going,

I actually really like that.

That's what BMW should have been like.

Look at the size of that grille.

Yeah, but that is a massive grille.

That is considerably larger than the ones

they put on their modern BMWs.

And that just makes it look like a pleasure.

Yeah, which is, that is better.

Yeah, this is the thing.

I actually do think it looks better than the

big grilles, but I still think it looks

better than that.

I think it does, but I still don't think it

looks that good.

That's my point.

My point is it's better, but still not great.

It looks to me like one of the electric

Mercedes, they have now the EQ,

the Exmiley face grille.

Yeah, not great.

So, I'm gonna assume it's got M4 mirrors.

Yeah, I believe it is basically just fully,

fully.

That's not it.

It's fully based on M4.

News, that was it.

603 horsepower.

I can see here in the photo of the sight I

was stolen it from.

So it's got a remap in it.

Piping an email, bro?

That's actually an M4, the remap.

Yep, genuinely.

It's got a tuning box or something.

Only other piece of news of note is there was

something, I think this is from the same

event, this BMW Speed Top.

Wow, all BMW news is--

Which is, this is a shooting break.

This is what people believe our YouTube channel is.

Yeah.

Who've watched one video?

They go, "It's just all BMW."

They're listening to this going,

"Lovely."

See?

Time to get to the comment.

Do you see?

All they talk about is BMW, it's all they like.

Shut up.

Short job off.

The Speed Top, I think it's really,

really good.

I think I like it.

I really, that also is if BMWs were designed

in this vein, they're modern cars.

I think so for those there's much--

You have the pleasure of eyes right now.

What are they looking at?

It is a shooting break, two-door BMW thing.

And I believe it is based on the M8.

So it's a big boy, it's along the V8.

Yeah, it's got the V8.

But the thing I want to make note of more

than anything is proof that BMW can do it.

Look at the fitment and the chunk on that rear wheel.

Look how he fits to the body.

That is simply lovely.

So what they're going to do though,

is they're going to build it.

Seventy.

Seventy of those, they're going to build,

I believe, the 500,000 Euro or pound price tag.

But there was a lot of stuff I was seeing.

It's a ghetto.

I believe so, yeah.

But one of the things I was seeing a lot of

in the week was people joking about this.

This is the inside of just a normal four

series with the same colorway.

No, it's not, that's the actual interior.

It's just a normal interior.

That's an A series interior.

Exactly.

So there's a lot of people saying there was

people posting photos of this alongside like

a three series based interior saying,

is the difference between a 450,000 pound

difference between these two cars.

Does it say better?

Does that say something good about the three

or four series?

Yeah, which is fair.

I like that interior.

So they haven't changed much here.

They've just sort of, it's kind of like an individual.

Yeah, it's just a nice spec interior.

But you know what, I'd be pleased to see some

cool specs on that.

And also what I can't wait is to see those

set of wheels on a skid-car E36 at some point

when someone's managed to get their hands on it.

I like those wheels a lot.

Yeah, it was very nice.

So that's it for us.

I think that's it for us.

Again, as we say, most weeks there will be

other news and you'll have to go and find

them yourselves 'cause nothing has flagged up to us.

I put in here Fiesta Police Story.

Sure.

Now I kind of put this in to take the heat off Ben.

Okay.

I was actually thinking about this over the weekend.

Okay.

You decided to have try a hand at blocking doctors.

No, that's interesting.

That's very similar.

You've been very, very similar.

You've been very, very similar.

It wasn't me all week.

So that's nice.

Precisely.

Yeah, but I thought you know what,

Ben made a mistake.

You've been all over Ben's bath all week.

That's not a mistake, 'cause it wasn't a doctor.

I'm trying to help you.

I didn't make a mistake.

All right.

Well, Ben could have made a mistake.

Yes, completely different.

According to some of you, Ben made a mistake.

Well, that's fine.

But the point I'm actually trying to make is

that you're not telling me that every single

one of you listening hasn't made a slightly

embarrassing border.

Fair, fair, fair.

Now, I remember, I was probably about 17 or

18, and when you start driving and I was

going to sixth

20:27 Embarrassing Driving Stories

form, I picked my mate up and we drove to school.

It was one of the first times I did this,

I felt like the man.

Yeah.

And I'm driving down this road and it's

school hour, so it's actually quite busy.

And all the cars in front of me,

they suddenly start to pop and they kept,

they were just like pulling up on the side of

the road and I thought, "Oh,

weird."

Bruce Almighty style.

Yeah, nothing clocked in my brain.

I thought, "How bizarre is that?"

I just kept driving through them.

Driving through, driving through,

I thought, "What a weird, I thought it was

people pulling over to let people out at school."

I thought it was a bit early for that on the

road and also for them all to do it at once,

but I thought it was fine.

I'll keep driving, kept driving,

maybe for sort of, not that long,

but like 30, 40 seconds.

My mate didn't spot anything either and I

kept driving and I looked at my mirror and

there was just a police car.

Oh my goodness.

I've never, ever, I don't, as you don't think

I've ever felt more embarrassed in a car than

that, I immediately pulled over like just

wherever to let them pass, but I felt terrible.

Yeah, but it did, I blocked him,

yeah.

Wow.

Yeah, but police don't save lives,

doctors do.

Sure, yeah.

That's actually a crazy statement.

Yeah, but they do.

Yeah, but they both do.

Okay, so why did you block a lot to that?

And if so, I did.

Oh!

And misunderstanding.

My point is, people have mistakes.

Yeah.

It happens.

The best of us.

Listen, it happens.

It really does, then you aren't a bit older than that.

You should know that.

You've been driving a while.

Prove it.

Oh, okay.

Yeah, you are actually quite a young boy.

Next up I put, that's, you know,

that's nice of you.

Nice of you, thanks for sharing.

Yeah, I just, I remembered it and I thought you're not.

I'm gonna let that off.

Okay.

I'm gonna, I need to get it out there.

Now Edwin.

If you were the police, hi.

Anything on your own, do you want to admit?

I think I might have talked about it before,

but the only time I've ever been pulled over,

I was driving like an absolute dick and I

was, people with vision will behind see the

rear end of a black mark for golf and the

reason that that's special is because Will

and I are gonna do a series,

not the next series, 'cause Will's bought

something very cool for the next series,

which the wheel is of, the wheel belongs to

here, and it's not any normal voxel,

it's a cool one, but after that series,

Will and I are gonna buy back identical

versions of our original first cars and do

the builds that we always wish we could do,

and I found my perfect golf identical in

every way to mine.

I was on the way home to my parents,

I think I've talked about it before,

but quickly, I came off around about,

this was like 2 a.m., went over around about

at speed, at silly speed, and then as I got

to a dual carriageway, sorry,

it was just about to be a dual carriageway,

there was a truck doing like 30.

So I went around a keep left island,

it was bad, it was dumb.

I was like 2 a.m., and I was like,

no one's around.

Yeah, what was around was a police car who

was going into the roundabout the same time

that he watched me fly over it,

and he turned around about to check what I

would do and watch me go around the other

side of the island.

That's not looking good.

So the lights went on, he pulled me over,

and he literally just went, what are you doing?

I was like, I'm sorry, I'm just driving like

a dick, I've completely agreed.

But in that moment I was like,

even I was like, what's wrong with me?

There was no reason to do that.

If I had waited 10 more seconds,

I could have gone past them,

the dual carriageway, there's no reason to

have done it.

So I just felt like an absolute clown,

a huge clown.

Yeah, but in terms of holding up the

emergency service now, it's never something I

would never do.

And have you ever been pulled over by the police?

I don't mention driving.

Have you ever been pulled over by the police?

Have you ever been pulled over by the police?

Have you ever been pulled over by the police?

Have you ever been pulled over by the police?

Have you ever been pulled over by the police?

No, I haven't mentioned driving.

Have you actually never been pulled over?

No.

I thought, well, I was in my mates--

I thought I was.

Golf R32, we were coming off the motorway.

Nice.

A policeman came up behind us and flashes

like blue lights on, as in pull over,

and then he starts pulling over,

but we were coming off the motorway,

so he was like, well, I'll just come off the

motorway, like I was going to.

But he put his green lights on.

We started to go off it, and yeah,

I got back into the lane, I believe.

(laughs) No, I was right.

He came up behind us, like, close,

lights on by that, okay, cool,

we'll come off the motorway.

As we come off the motorway,

he just turned them off and just zoomed off somewhere.

I probably got another call.

More important call.

The little bit lights off.

They was like, you know what,

home.

Yeah, I'm gonna make this guy come on by the way.

It was six o'clock, he finished at six.

Yeah, maybe, I don't know if--

He's along went off.

Oh, yeah.

It's a very weird one.

Okay, it's tomorrow at nine.

As you know, that's about a story,

I wasn't driving because I don't mention

driving on the podcast.

He doesn't mention driving on the podcast.

No more, no more.

Ben doesn't drive anymore.

Ben doesn't drive.

Ben is giving up.

Ben, I now drive over to Bristol and pick him

up in the morning.

(laughs)

I'm in great shape, I'm gonna walk to you.

Ben is now a passenger princess.

Oh yeah, I'm like kicking my legs in the back seat.

In the back seat, in the child seat.

You've got a Stanley car.

I don't think I've been, I don't think I've

been pulled over for the last seven or eight years.

I was gonna say, I was like.

Early on in my drive, I put in some big shifts.

I think you've been

in the series we did, but you never explained

it on the

podcast.

I will say that for another one.

We'll do some proper police stories.

I did get pulled over again,

so it's the same sort.

I wasn't driving as much of a penis in that,

I was in my M3, a blue M3.

I just wanted to get home, so it was very,

very cold.

But for whatever reason, I have the windows

down, because M3.

And I had my hood up, and I was wearing gloves.

So I would have looked incredibly suspect.

And I was driving down this road,

and I probably just too fast,

I don't know, I don't care.

And then the police car pulled me over,

and he was like, "You're in a rush."

And he went to take the temptation to say,

"Yeah, actually, I just wanna get home.

"Thank you, and you're now delaying me."

But I was like, "Oh."

"Well, you know, it's like, you've got

basically said to stop making a penis."

But I realized at the time, I'm hooded up,

gloves on wearing a black hoodie in the M3.

"What are you doing in Maidenhead today?"

"No, I said, I'm just speeding."

"Just come to speed, just come to speed in the roads."

"It's nothing like reading."

"Not at all."

Oh, McGann Randfand wire I put in here,

this is a, I discovered a new Frenchism this weekend.

I've had an issue on McGann recently,

which I thought was a thermostat where the

temperature just is not good.

It never gets to the temperature you want to get.

Or you'll get to the temperature,

then it cools down or whatever.

I thought maybe that's thermostat,

not too sure.

But also with overheat a bit in traffic,

I thought this is not really a thermostat

thing, but it could be.

So replaced it and it still did it that night.

So I was confused.

So I went on to the McGann group on Facebook.

Lovely.

Yo, what's going on?

Yeah.

Yeah.

And a load of you all came back with lots of responses.

Lots just a thermostat, thermostat,

thermostat.

I said, I replaced that.

And the guy said, have you checked this wire?

It's a wire that, if you take,

'cause I've taken the battery tray out at

some of these times, he said,

if you've taken it out, you may have

forgotten to do it, 'cause

it'll just drop down.

There is a single power cable that attaches

to like an ECU bracket on the back of the

battery cable that powers the rad.

That powers the rad fan story.

Yeah.

Oh, so if you don't have it last like month or so.

Great.

So my rad fan was never coming on,

which I thought I'd heard it,

but I think it would just blow us all over.

So yeah, I put that back on.

Just fine.

Fine.

Of course, raging, assuming.

Why?

I looked, the guy, one man said it in a

comment, and he said, have you checked this?

I was like, obviously not gonna miss it.

And I opened my bonnet, and I just saw this

red wire dangling down the side of the battery.

Really?

'Cause it looks like it's leading off elsewhere.

Yeah, it goes, yeah.

And I looked at the top, and connected to

anything, wasn't it?

We have Eden Zohair.

Yeah, it's running me exactly over the

starter motor thing.

It's like, everything else is like,

yeah, we're sort of powered all off the same

cable and go, except for the radiator fan,

he has his own power source,

and you must connect him on his own.

That must have been the delivery start

tomorrow, and someone went, oh,

I forgot to power up the fan,

they do keep them heating.

I forgot to wire the fan.

Why do these man cans keep them heating?

Ooh, no one's plugged the fan in.

I tell you what, put it on the back of the

battery, but it was annoyed.

So that's nice, because it was a simple fix,

I thought if this is something more major,

I'd be annoyed, but a nice, easy fix,

and then a day later, it broke down.

You've got some plans for that again,

right?

Yeah, I've been speaking to a man about seats.

Okay, it's a place called AMX Performance.

So I've seen a bunch of types of you search

for like, sportsters or pole positions,

Recaro seats on eBay.

You'll see this image of these seats against

the wall, yeah?

Sitting against the wall, yeah.

They're a company basically,

they're a company in Poland and I said,

can you, they can make custom like seat covers.

So I messaged them and said,

hello, can I do this?

James, mate.

And they said, yeah, I want the exact

Alcantara that's on my steering wheel.

So it's very specific, I was like,

I don't, 'cause that's gonna be annoying.

Of course you can't do that.

So I might get those retrimmed in full Alcantara.

I have a shifter, a cooler work shifter on

the way, rear seat to leak, all that kind of stuff.

But yeah, I'm excited for that car.

with that bloody touch line.

Hey, you gotta push through to get to the guitar.

It's also great, 'cause everyone who has seen

that break the log.

(laughing) It's typical French.

It's literally probably my fault.

(laughing)

Generally, that car, it wouldn't,

because I've been messing with it.

I always find that when people say,

"No cars broke all the time."

Yeah.

Because people mess with them all the time.

Or you've bought a, what is a 100,000 pound

car new and tried to run it for seven pound

80, 18 years later.

A professionally put together vehicle.

I'm not saying manufacturers are absolutely,

perfect, but a car that's put together by the

factory or by, you know, people who know what

they're doing.

And then, and then sweaty man McGee comes

along and goes, "I think I'll modify it."

I think I'll use your account.

No, I think I'll just fix it with hammer and pliers.

And then when it breaks, I go,

"You're damn French!"

Which is about basically what we do.

Fair.

We say the exact same thing.

Absolutely, absolutely true.

So it's not my fault, it is the French's fault.

It's not my fault, it's my fault.

It's not my fault, it's France's my fault.

This is actually another one for me again.

So after that, I think that's it for me,

but V8 Signet, I told you about this.

In my breakdown, at the side of the road,

Mégane broke down, I'm sat there,

just on a slip road on the M25,

not much to do.

So I was sort of just biting my time,

waiting for a recovery truck to turn up.

And because it was a quite a nice bank

holiday weekend, there were lots of cars

coming past, obviously some of the cars were

going to shed first, some are going to other

shows, so I could do a little bit of car spotting.

I had this V8 in the distance,

and the V8 is going to tanking past me,

and then it was just a V8 Aston Martin

Signet, so for those that don't know,

what is an Aston Martin Signet?

I can't remember it, it's about 10 years ago now.

That's an Aston Martin Signet,

contrary to your eyes believing that that is

just a Toyota IQ.

It's based on that, which is just a Toyota IQ.

I think the engine's the same,

but it's like different kit,

the interior has lots of leather and cushions.

And it was built simply so that Aston can

pass some emissions regulations,

their fleet scores, was too low overall,

so they bought a load of these Toyota IQs,

rebranded them as badge engineering,

Aston so that they could pull down their average CO2.

They're still incredibly expensive.

Oh, they're very expensive.

But in one off, I think it was like,

is it the works team basically put together a

wide arched?

Look at that, nuts.

That's cool.

And that's got the 4.7, I think it is.

Yeah, from the V8 Vantage.

And look at the width on it.

That's just insane.

Stuffed into a signal.

absolutely haring past me.

And I looked at my go, I said,

did you see that?

It's like, what?

So that's the V8 signet.

And she looked at me as if I had just spoken Russian.

Is it just one?

And there is only one.

I thought, maybe there are a few of them.

Maybe it's going to a show, maybe.

And I looked up and that is a one off.

I thought, okay, well, who the hell Aston

Martin went right?

It's Sunday, I'm out in the signet.

All right, boys, we'll take the signet out today.

I'm not sure how it happened,

but Nicholas, me, which is quite a very

famous Aston Martin, sort of specialist,

if you like, hold of it to sell.

And I checked on the website and it wasn't

for sale anymore.

That was back in March.

So I'm assuming someone has bought it and it

was just flying, like flying.

He'd just come off the M40 on the M25 and he

was really giving it the full beans.

So whoever that was, fair play.

Good on you.

Because God knows what the insurance bill is

on a one off Aston Martin segment.

Oh, he's just the Toyota RIQ.

It's just cheap.

Yeah, Deirdry is just calling on to the

insurer like you.

I thought you found me here.

I'd like to know how much that costs.

What to buy?

Yo, yeah.

It's not like it is an Aston Aston,

but it is very interesting.

I could have sworn that there was a an

article about it.

Yeah.

Well, you move on now.

We'll see if I can find it.

I feel like it could be 50 grand,

but it could also be a million pounds.

Or it could be 10 grand.

It could be 10 grand.

It could be any price that our minds

can think of.

£2.50.

No, I think.

£20 million.

£1,000.

Does it tickle your fancy in that car?

Because you're a vantage man.

No.

It's cool.

I can appreciate it.

But I think I'd be too scared to do any kind

of driving it.

It says here for driving, really.

Interested parties are invited to inquire.

So there was, yes, there's no actual number

on what it went for.

I'm going to say it was £400,000.

In my head, I feel like I remember hearing

something about a half a million pound figure.

So if the owner of it listens to the podcast,

he doesn't.

Or any creamers that are in the know,

because we do have a lot of them.

34:00 Aston Martin Signet Encounter

Creamers in the know, Creamers in the know is

a great album.

Also, it's a great section.

If there's any creamers in the know with

information about anything at all,

comment down

below the price of the signal.

And do you know what?

Guess.

Guess.

Just put in what you think it is.

I want them to at

least come across as facts.

Do you know what?

If it isn't

real, make it as convincing as possible.

I don't do if butts

or maybets.

I do absolutes.

Exactly.

Exactly.

Cool.

Talk about Shufus, didn't we?

That's crazy.

Surely not.

I thought we did.

Was that just the other day?

Is that?

Oh, how have we talked about it though?

Yeah.

Yeah, we just put it.

This is a podcast.

And then we sit about an hour at a time and

we talk about things and we've just spoke about that.

Let's talk about shed fest.

Oh, did you make it there in here?

I think.

Yeah.

Oh, that's cool.

I got there about what time were we meant to be there?

Nine.

Yeah.

We're not one.

Not one.

30.

No, you were quite quiet on the stage,

weren't you?

Yeah.

No, no.

It was.

I'm not actually part of the TDC.

It's now a three man thing.

Oh, yeah.

It's just a joint.

There was a imagination.

We got a point from you, Edwin,

here, which says do not laugh local BP station.

OK, so we play a game.

Can I just preface this?

I thought you were sending do not laugh.

Like, oh, guys, don't laugh at this.

And then you just said the word BP station.

Did it work on your bed?

I didn't laugh.

OK, OK.

So he liked the heart.

We played that one.

We play a game here.

Perhaps.

I don't think this is exclusive to us.

I know many friend games play.

like friend games, friend groups play it.

But things are always funnier when you're not

supposed to laugh or you're not allowed to laugh.

So we will often take a photo or something

and then say to your person,

don't laugh and send the photo.

Now, this happened last night.

I was yet again at the unit last on Bank

Holiday yesterday Monday, left here and went

to the local BP station, which is just down the road.

We all know it's the coldest BP on Earth.

That's fantastic.

And I implore you not to laugh.

OK.

walked in, got some fuel, walked up to the

counter, and it was a middle-aged woman.

And she went, oh, do you want a free cucumber?

And my girlfriend was standing there.

And I literally went, can I get it?

Sorry?

What was that?

And she said it so nonchalantly,

she went, there's a load of free cucumbers if

you want any.

And she pointed, she went over the counter

and points down.

And I looked down and there was one of those

green grocers, boxes.

full of cucumbers in a BP.

In a BP.

Nice.

And she kind of mumbled something about how

we got loads of extra ones.

And I was like, okay.

And I was like, oh, I was going to make a salad salting.

I'll take a cucumber.

She took one and then we went,

you can take as many as you want.

You can take as many cucumbers as you want.

Are they hot cucumbers?

No, they were just moving.

She said, are they, you know,

we ordered too many, we need to go.

Okay, they're not stolen.

But then I was like, you know,

find out.

was like really pressuring me into it.

Yeah.

And so I took one and she went,

you show you only one, one, you can have as

many cucumbers as you want.

And she's like, you know what,

I'll get people back to this petrol station.

It's for cucumbers.

And do you know what, I thought,

because, because you, you maybe wouldn't believe me.

I decided to get a photo.

Oh, so there's the cucumber.

And then this is my, my entire drive home for

the rest of the evening.

I was just staring at that.

Oh, that's nice.

Just sat in my, just sat in my driver's back

in my, my juice cucumber.

But so I thought, I thought,

I thought between that, and we've maybe

talked about it before, the woman who sings

at you in the petrol station near me.

Why, why do some petrol stations,

especially when it's like late at night,

have this, what's that thing called?

Liminal space energy, where there's just

weird things going on.

I think there are, there are hotspot for weird stuff.

It's like a, a lot of independent type petrol.

Stations can be like that, where it's,

do you remember the, we went to go and get the coarser?

Yes.

And that was enough, all right.

It was a, it was at a place called mold,

mold, mold, we went to mold,

where all the hot hatches are,

it turned out when we were looking.

And we stopped at a petrol station and it was

like, it was late as well.

This little independent petrol station was

still open and it was just like a family run

thing inside.

I hadn't really actually seen a petrol

station like this.

But then it was all in like 10 or 11 o'clock at night.

Yeah, someone come in and go,

"Oh, you're right Dave, yeah."

"What's going on, what's happening in this?"

Petri stations at that time,

they are, you speak to a man through glass.

I would say, I would like, number four,

please go and retrieve me.

Meanwhile, wine gums.

There was a ride on lawnmower for sale in the

front window.

All that pepper station.

It was really quite interesting,

you quite wild.

And I think I went in and I bought a ham

sandwich at like 10.

And she said something to the effect of like,

"Ooh, could you keep your energy up?"

"What's going on?"

There's fresh cucumbers for sale.

There's cucumber if you want it.

So I thought I'd, this is one for the creamers.

What's the most bizarre petrol station encounter?

Not necessarily in the forecourt,

but when you went in your weirdest purchase

thing you've seen for sale in said,

"Just always ridiculous."

So yeah, that's my cucumber story of the cucumber story.

Ben, you've

39:14 Creepers and Edging in Traffic

put a creeper.

Creeper had a message for me.

Oh man, that's Minecraft.

Talk about Minecraft now.

No, it was a message I received from a man

called Believe Grant, two seconds back in the morning.

Grant's called Believe Grant.

Grant, you passage.

We'll see you up to it.

It was Grant, new passage.

That's his last name.

And there's a man called Grant.

He says, "Hi, Ben.

I hope Shedfest was good.

Quick topic for the podcast.

Creepers, people who in stationary traffic,

come to a stop leaving a massive gap in front

of themselves and then slowly creep forwards.

Even though the traffic isn't moving,

I've noticed this a lot recently and wondered

what you do and the rest of the cream team."

I think that's essentially an edge.

Yeah, I was going to say now,

I'm just not front of the queue edges.

But I would rather be a creeper.

Creepers do wind me out.

But quite a lot.

What do you do in this situation when you're

sat behind one?

Do you whip the handbrake off and move

forwards, take up the gap created by the

creeper or do you sit there with a big gap in

front of you now, making it like you were the

explicit who left the gap in the first place?

I sit there, I don't care.

I'll wait.

It depends on what's going on behind me,

but nine times out of 10, yeah,

I will wait.

I don't care.

I got nothing but time.

It's not benefiting me, especially I think it

makes more sense for people,

the people in front when they're in

automatics, they're just letting go and

they'll roll forward.

If I'm in manual, which nine times out of 10,

I am, I'm sitting, I'm not riding that clutch.

I'm ripping that e-brake and powering over.

If I've been an auto, I'll probably close the

gap because it is, it bears no consequence.

It doesn't take much.

I can.

Yeah.

Because I will.

But those people, they don't make sense to me.

But at the same time, there are people I've

seen in traffic jams that will leave a

massive, oh, they won't move in front.

It's like, I think their thinking is,

it's like I get to move for longer.

It's like, rather than doing like 10 foot at

a time, they're like, I'm going to do 100

foot at a time.

Also, if that's you, I wish nothing but ill for

you.

If you are in a very old car that's

overheating, that's a tech, that's a

technique is leaving a bigger gap.

So you can give some speed up,

get some cooling through.

and then you can come back down.

It is opposed to going just inching forward and forward.

But if you're in a modern normal car,

you don't need to do it.

Also, handbrake on what he said.

Yeah, I'm very rarely using my handbrake for

that kind of stuff.

I'm a footbrake only man.

Handbrake is for stop and skids.

Yeah.

Handbrake is for perma stop.

Yeah.

Ben has no, I simply don't talk about driving

on the podcast.

Oh, of course.

Let's talk about this is like this is normal stuff.

You know what?

You're going to upset the creamers more by

doing that than you will.

anything else.

Look, if you're not going to,

if you're not going to input,

but just don't know, we're going to get,

we're going to get a doctor on the podcast to

replace you.

Well, he will get here.

Are you well?

Now, edging, you don't do edging.

I don't edge.

You don't edge.

Do you creep?

I don't talk about driving.

But do you.

I'll let you in on a little secret.

Do you cream?

Yeah.

I'm a creamer.

Okay.

Cool.

Creepers.

Sure.

We've all probably done it.

Now, you end up becoming the creeper if

someone, because the thing is,

if someone in front of me moves,

I'm not going to sit down and move forward.

Creepers are caused by edges.

Yeah.

It's true.

Yeah.

Absolutely.

I don't really mean a situation where I have

to be the creeper.

And that's all I'll say, because I do not

speak about driving on the podcast.

Nobody puts me in a position where I have to edge.

Exactly.

I want to edge on my own terms.

I'm not creeping when you're edging.

Just because you're edging.

Exactly.

Exactly.

Now, I like that one.

But the man in the front of the queue,

he edges.

Yeah.

And then the people behind feel a need to creep.

Oh, a need to creep.

Yeah.

is a good one.

Okay.

Fair.

I can't talk personally.

But what was this question?

Can you talk hypothetically from now on,

please?

Hypothetically, one may have to creep.

Let's come up.

Ben, here's...

Okay.

We have got a list.

We have been coming up for years and years.

We're going to talk about this with Richard Porter.

But we have got a list of names that aren't names.

The names that sound like things.

Perhaps, give me an example,

Will.

We've got Sue Flay.

Sue Flay.

Yes.

Susan Flay.

Rodney Nock.

That's Rob Mock.

For instance, one is Patrick O'Heter.

That's patio heater.

That's the classic.

Now, Ben, what we're going to do is I'm going

to pull up.

I'm just going to pull up.

I'm going to get the cucumbers out.

I'm suggesting an alias.

I'm going to suggest...

No, it's not an alias.

Ben is going to speak on behalf of someone.

Can I have context this?

This list has been going on for possibly two years now.

It's around about two years.

It is a group show we have on WhatsApp

between it is with us three and then all the gay guys.

Yes, and everyone occasionally you get a

little pin on your phone and the name comes

up, have a little giggle.

It has slowed down much more.

Yeah, I think the list is almost a

thousand names.

It knows well over a thousand.

But half of

them are in WhatsApp.

So I have up to about six.

I have up

to 550 on my phone here.

So Ben, if you could please choose

a number to 150, we're going to find you one

of your

aliases.

322.

Number 322, if I just come over here,

is Charlotte.

SNES, Charlotte Pnes, which is sharpness.

It's not that great.

We can get you in Toby Frank,

which is to be Frank.

I want one more.

One more re-roll, please.

191.

191.

It's in a spreadsheet, right?

So that's why you have a little.

It is Angus Burger.

Angus Burger is my alias.

Angus Burger is not your alias.

He's the guy we know.

He drives A.

Up to you.

Kia Picanto.

Lovely.

Now, when Angus, what's Angus's pension problems?

Yeah.

When Angus gets to the lights,

is he is he creeping?

He's not.

You know him quite well.

Now, is he creeping?

He

is forced to creep because of edges.

Okay.

I think he's not happy about it,

but he does do it.

I don't think he'd ever pull up.

He creeps when he needs to.

I don't think he'd ever pull up to the

lights, purposely far away, and then edge

towards them or pull up to traffic,

purposely far away, and then carry on driving

to not stop.

Do you know what?

I think this is actually quite good that we

all have friends that we speak on behalf of.

Will, can I interest you in,

I'll interest you in a number.

I'll have a clove.

I'll get 501.

501, please.

I can.

So we're allowed three rules.

I think there's another one.

I think there's another one.

There's another one.

No, no, no, no.

550 is welcoming.

I think there's a third person to add.

501 is Terry Tory.

Terry, that's nice.

We'll go three each and you can choose your favorite.

Oh, 333, 333.

I think there's another.

There's Creeper's edges and there's one other one.

These are manual people.

These are the throwing it back.

Oh, okay.

They're the ones that are just rolling back.

Yeah, that I hate and a Creeper hate to throw

it back in.

People always throw it back in vans.

Yeah.

Yeah.

They always throw it back in vans.

Well, your number, number 333 is your mate,

Renee Sontz.

Renee Sontz is very good.

It's a very good.

I will take, I don't know what I will take my thirds.

Just to check what the third is.

I'll take a 30.

Number 30.

I can go like early doors on this.

Early doors are probably quite nice.

I've got one on there.

Is Louise Tennant, AKA Lieutenant.

Nice, nice.

That's really the American saying.

Who do you like?

You Renee Sontz?

Renee Sontz, I'll go with it.

So Renee, I'm gonna hand it to you and I.

Renee Sontz, Angus Burger, and we'll go full.

I've locked your phone.

Oh, that's great.

Here we go.

I'm mocking phones.

There you go, please.

Can I start with number 99?

Not Meghan Bites.

Meghan Bites.

Okay.

Can I get one?

That's been Meghan O'Bites.

One 48.

Please?

One 48.

This is like the Fast and Furious scene where

he's choosing the GTL.

One 48, we've got Susan Shee.

Sue Shee.

Sue Shee.

I think we'll see what our last option is.

That'll be 441, please.

One 41, scrolling.

Scrolling, I'll serve people.

When are you going to talk about cars?

Sorry, we just got to find out.

Oh, interesting one.

This is anamorphic.

Oh, no, I'd like Sue.

Sue Shee.

Sue Shee.

Yeah, okay.

Sue Shee, Renaissance and Angus Burger.

Remember your friends, please.

A three crime doing aliases.

Sue Shee.

Was it perhaps Angus holding up a doctor?

Exactly.

Sue Shee.

Must have been.

Susan's got pulled over in that Mark Fargolf.

Why is it a bit through?

Ridiculous.

Why is it through some roundabout?

Silly.

Renaissance was back from driving at that point.

Renaissance was doing a silly speed at a

silly age, in a silly car and got banned and

didn't last for forgiveness.

is from the police officer at the side of the

road and asked for a speed awareness course.

I like that.

I'm a fan of that.

We've got our gang.

So we will now use those from now on to discuss it.

I do not talk about driving at the top of us.

Ben doesn't talk about its personal driving.

But you will talk about it.

Angus is on the blower to me every night,

telling me all about the driving that happens.

And can I please talk about one thing?

Please, please.

Let's remind me after I mentioned vans a minute ago.

Is it apology?

No, no, I've done plenty of that.

The-- Angus.

You know, Mercedes Sprinter vans?

Yes.

Why are they always destroyed?

I must know this.

I was driving.

No, no, I was not driving.

Sorry.

Angus told me he was driving the other day.

Yeah.

And there was a-- I kid you not a 74-plate

Sprinter, which is four people who don't know

September of last year-- Last year.

--about March this year, registered,

basically brand new car.

And that thing was destroyed,

like hanging off bits of rust from where it

had been hit and then like being in the rain.

Crazy.

It must have 74 per-- Genuinely,

that thing must have had maximum--

I mean, 10,000 miles of me a push,

but 5,000 miles.

And it looked like-- 5,000--

I think it might have more than that.

I reckon it's more because--

Ben, Ben's advanced all day every day.

All right, cool.

All right, cool.

Up to 20.

The recovery truck that picked me up on the

Macgane, the driver tome that he had 550,000

miles in it.

That's great.

It looked like it.

It looked like it as well.

It was rough.

But this was basically a brand new van.

Why is it every Sprinter van is destroyed?

Yeah.

If I see one and it parks next to me,

I get a bit nervous.

Sorry.

Ben gets nervous.

Of course.

They have dents in places that--

I look at the dent.

I do this with people's cars as well.

But I look at the dent and I go,

how did that dent happen?

Yeah.

What did you hit?

How was there a dent only 10 foot in the air,

but not below?

What high up pointy object did you hit?

Yeah, where did something throw something at you?

Did you roll and hit something?

What was it?

A person?

What happened?

You'll never believe it, but I've rolled the

Sprinter again.

It's

gone.

I've hit a wall, but it was just like a one-wall

story.

I was like jousting with another Sprinter,

and it just clocked my side panel.

It has to be that because they get used for

work fans, but then people who perhaps aren't

that used, like a transit, anyone who owns a

transit has been transiting for years.

They have got upwards of 74,000 parking

tickets slid down the front of the window.

There's takeaway menus, there's boxes of...

Exactly.

That's how you know you're safe.

They're going to come up behind you at

600,000 miles an hour, but they'll never hit

you because they've been doing it.

Amazon always.

Exactly.

Where is the Amazon?

They're always just absolutely destroyed.

DVD.

Yeah, sure.

DVD was

the driver from last week who looked like a

way to fight me.

That's what I'm saying, but DVD vans or

Amazon vans or any

sprinter are destroyed.

And he's threatened to drive it into a ditch.

And you know what?

He probably did it because he hadn't driven

it into a ditch for about 10 minutes.

He's like, my van's so clean.

You said, my boss said, if I don't come back

with some damage, he's going to fire me.

I've got to get rid of some of the battering

vans at the side of the road.

I guess if you're a mighty billion pound

company, it's probably worth your time more

to get there quickly and get the deliveries

done as fast as possible to do more and not

really care about a van.

Because if you've got billions of pounds of

the bank, you can buy a van and it gets mashed up.

I like the idea that it's financial advice with them.

Also, it's got billions of pounds in the bank.

van.

Also, I like the idea that Jeff Bezos is

getting called up by an Amazon delivery

driver going, Jeff, I've bumped the van again.

And I'm going, oh, I've just been on with the

body shot or on Ben's thinking.

Jeff goes, don't worry about it,

man.

We're a billion dollar company.

Leave

it.

We can buy vans.

You know what?

Hit the game.

You know

what?

Vans we can buy.

You know what?

We can't replace is

our next day delivery.

It's time.

It's probably fair.

Jeff,

mate.

Delirious.

Anything else?

There's actually not really much on here.

I actually, Ben has put in a one of the week.

I think.

Yes, okay.

Ben has a one.

So, last Tuesday.

Can I have a look?

We went to D.T.

Performance.

We did.

In Tamworth, Birmingham Way.

We talked.

Edwin, you drove a Corvette.

Yes.

We talked about it on the last product.

We did.

And I'm reminding the creamers.

And we'll drove a Hellcat.

And I'm

52:24 Corvette C7 Discussion

at the stage in the week where I'm editing that video.

And by Jove, do I want that Corvette?

He's quite good, isn't he?

Oh, my God.

Are you guys having us in the video yet?

But there's a section where you both got

together in the Corvette.

You go, let's get the roof down.

The roof goes down and you're driving for

like a tree area.

So it's like sort of echoing.

They call those forests.

That's the one.

The sound is echoing off the trees.

It just sounds amazing.

Honestly, I stand by when we went out in that car.

That is one of the most sensory experiences

of my entire life.

And I need one.

Yeah, I would die in one, but I need one.

What's it going to be?

What is your, what is your vet of choice?

I actually, I like, I like a C7 quite a lot.

Next generation.

Yeah, I

quite like them.

Oh, yeah.

Okay.

Sorry, I thought you were something else.

So the one with the mid-engine.

Very interesting noise.

I was going to be disappointed in you.

So I really don't like the new one.

I think it's wrong.

I think it is wrong.

I know it's probably better.

And Ben, is it a Z06 that you're after?

Yeah, well, yeah.

Oh, that is a great looking thing.

Is that what you want?

There's one of those down the road.

What?

At Noel Hill.

Oh, very nice.

Yeah, again, there's a super car dealer

that's 10 minutes from here.

I drive past it every morning and they've had

one of those for a little while and it's just

quite interesting.

That's wonderful.

Oh, this shape.

It's nice.

Yeah, but it doesn't do as much as the C6.

This is better and faster and more modern and whatever.

But a C6 has got, yeah.

But again, maybe it's the Lamborghini thing.

The Corvette you want is the Corvette you

grew up with.

Can we get in the comments, please?

Everyone who, your age and your favorite Corvette.

You can't tell me that that's not just the

angry source of this sort of headline design.

It shouldn't work.

Yeah, I like it.

It's 360 type of thing.

I hate that so much.

Do you actually?

I don't

like that.

But if I can't have a C7

that sounds like the one we had the other

day, I don't want one.

I don't actually think there's that much work

to make them sound like that.

I really don't think there's,

I think he said it's got, it had long tube

headers into literally what we did in E55

into no res and then a back box,

that's it.

The ZR1, I was looking at the ZR1 on Gran

Turismo, was deliberating what sort of

Corvette I might like to have.

And I don't like the ZR1's perfect almost,

but I don't like the bonnet on the ZR1.

You don't like the

bonnet?

No, because it's C.

But I didn't know, but that's

what makes it great.

No, but if it didn't have that,

it would be nice.

That's, if it did take, if it didn't have it,

that would be a Z06.

No, because it's got other bits.

It's got the size good.

The front of the side isn't a bumper different.

No, the front of the bumper is a Z06 bumper.

Is this side thing different?

I don't believe so.

I believe they are Z06 arches.

Is this not different?

No, I believe it at Z06 has that too.

The one with the Z06.

Yes, it's just.

Those, hang on, wait, before you move it,

though, that bonnet, or the ones like that,

always make me think they're on the wrong way around.

It feels like the wider bit,

the top should be the bit sucking air in.

What?

Oh, I see what you're saying.

Yeah, it feels like it's on backwards.

Yeah, so the side vent is different.

The rear vent is a little bit different.

The side vent is the same, it's different.

Oh, you mean into the door?

I thought you meant the one behind the rear arch.

Sorry, people who are listening right now are

very, very confused and better upset.

If that had a normal bonnet,

but then what if it, why not just a super charged ZO6?

That's what, well, maybe.

That's what I mean.

Yeah, that's, because that's why I don't care

what name it has.

I just want it to be without the plastic

thing on the bonnet, because I'm assuming

that's a cover or what.

Maybe it's not.

No, you can see into the, it's the super

charged run, but it's not doing anything.

It moves, that's it.

You can see the engine moving under the light.

That's just got American engine mounts on.

This is made out of cheese and rubber.

Just nothing, so it just twists around.

So Ben, your one of the week is a C7 Corvette.

I just want one fare.

Not in the UK.

I wouldn't have one here.

I'd have to move to like Texas,

and I'd just like to drive on a straight long

road from my house to McDonald's and back.

Big old pearl each time.

Maybe I'll pop into Costco and buy 7,000 toilet roll.

Yep, they would fit in the car,

leave them there, and then selling horsepower

back down the straight road to my house.

It's a great idea.

Fill up for 33 pence.

After that shoot, I genuinely debated whether

I should seriously talk to you guys about

moving to DC to America.

We've talked about it multiple times.

We would consider doing it.

Also, everyone in England.

I didn't do that, please.

Well, our family.

There is.

There are downsides.

All the actual good cars are more expensive.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah.

Much more.

We'd have to bring them with them.

The novelty of having American cars for

slightly cheaper, I think, would potentially

wear off within the first year.

Also, much more easy to do dumb stuff there.

Like, with many more drag strips,

more open space, more doing speeds.

We're getting more from money.

If we buy a unit there, we're getting land.

We're doing that here.

We're like Arizona, or I don't know enough,

but I'm Arizona, or that's good,

or like Texas.

You can get a lot of space.

We can get a big old unit.

Imagine this, the DT Performance unit,

which we said we liked, that sort of unit,

about 8,000 square feet, I believe.

Now Ben's now real estate.

It's about 8,000 square feet.

Really good local amenities.

Schools are just a culture of business.

That's what I mean.

Get a lot of American cars in there,

boys corvettes outside, and we're just doing

long straight roads.

There aren't that many American cars that I like.

I think that's the thing.

There's a select few cool ones.

I'm gonna say there's a handful.

Yeah, that's the answer.

But then I actually can't name that handful.

So there's possibly less than a handful.

They still have other cars in the US.

A Corvette.

A Viper.

Yeah, but what?

You're gonna be in W's in there.

Yeah, they're expensive.

But also, there's something that's something

that's deeply wrong about what they have to

do to European cars there.

Their headlights and tail lights are almost

always different.

There's something about it that they just

mess it up because Americans gotta go,

"Oh hell, you gotta make that safer,

buddy."

Their bumpers are always different and they

put ridiculous reflectors on things.

But when I see an American, like a European

car in the US, there's always something just

not right about it.

Not so much these days, these days,

these days, they...

All the reflectors are wrong and it's just

not as nice as a European one.

I also don't like the number plates.

I like number plates, American number plates,

cool.

They're the best ones.

Yeah, which is fine.

And they're fonts are weird.

But you can have whatever you want on it.

Yeah, but it's just times only Roman on their

number plate.

Yeah, but you can have our formats just nice and clean.

Yeah, but imagine being able to put...

You don't have to say frog X with a six in it.

You could have frog, but you also couldn't

'cause it's a random again, you can't have that there.

I don't like having different colored plates.

I would like to have white plates,

so it's cleaner.

Yeah, it moves to California.

But as I'm saying, sometimes you have like in

this country, you have a yellow plate can

ruin the back of a car.

Give me three American cars.

A Corvette C6.

A Corvette you would have.

A Dodge Demon.

I went back last night and watched the Grand

Tour episode where they had the Demon on

there, and it's just great.

Have you seen the price of a Demon?

I mean, this is here.

Yeah, there's actually not one for sale here,

but there's something Europe.

100 grand here?

More.

100 grand.

It gets you a Hellcat, like 150.

I was looking and you can get like an old

Hellcat for like 30 grand now.

Not a wide body.

You can get a non wide body.

We have a look and we couldn't find any.

You can find SRT8 challenges for like 25 to 30.

I look nice and whatever else.

Oh, that could be different.

I don't know.

But I'd have a Hellcat, probably,

I'd probably die a demon.

I'd have a C7.

I think you died a Hellcat.

And I'd have not.

Is it half American or just in America?

What?

I'd have a BMW M5 in America.

No, I've just got me in

America.

Will is saying...

Do you want to have it?

I'm having some sort of ridiculous truck.

One with like 800 horsepower.

Just for the reason.

The truck thing just doesn't do anything.

Roll around like a truck.

Yeah, it just doesn't.

What is the...

I don't understand.

The RAM that we saw, the SRT10.

I don't know.

I call it like an F450.

It's so sad.

Again, US only.

If you have an F150 here, odd,

odd man.

Yeah.

You are competent.

People say that about supercars,

but I think if you've got a 150 here,

your penis is so small.

Now, let me...

Let me pull it up.

Let me throw

it back at you.

Oh, sure.

Please tell me your three cars you'd have in the US.

It's easy for me.

I'd have many American cars.

I like to see.

I'd have Terminator Cobra all day every day.

I'd have a Corvette.

I'd have a Viper.

I'd have an Impala SS of the '90s generation.

I would have...

What's an Impala SS?

Is the one that B Smalls got shot in.

Is that the one that got shot,

Bob?

Yes, correct.

I like those a lot.

That's what my...

I'd have a Grand Marquis, a Mercury Grand

Marquis, which is based on the full Cranvik,

but the black, all black, black that one.

No, sorry, not Grand Marquis.

A Marauder is what

that's called.

The black one, black one, black one.

That's cool.

That's five.

I asked for three and you said five.

Oh, I can keep going.

Okay, but I said three.

Okay.

I need your top three.

I'll top three is a Terminator Cobra,

a C6 vet with some form of procharger on it

or supercharger, and there's something I'm

missing that I like a lot.

Oh, a GT500, I am legend, a generation,

the pre facelift, 20, 2005, 2006.

Okay.

Or a 4GT.

I love 4GT as well, 2005.

Yeah, very cool.

Right, that's fair.

It moved three.

I don't like snakes.

Is that all ones there?

Okay.

A demon, not a demon, sorry,

like a, oh, I don't know what,

any of that range.

Yeah.

As long as it's a wide body,

like a right, I don't get it.

An angry looking challenge with a wide body.

Yeah, look, and it's got a supercharger we

could, that's what I'm good with.

Five per cent did it for me.

I don't like the engine in a,

like there's something, not even like an ACR.

Yeah, they are cool, but there's something

that would be upset me about the fact you've

got eight and a half liters that makes nine horsepower.

I know they make a lot of power.

but yeah, it's just, there's something,

it's very American.

Oh yeah, I don't like that it's a V10,

I'm gonna be honest.

Why does that sound that good?

It's American, I think it should be a big deal.

Oh, I don't agree we should be a big RV.

They sound good, but I don't like for,

they don't, that is one of the worst sounding V10s.

I don't agree it's diesel in noise.

No, early ones are, the late ones,

they sound great.

But they're not in, they're not in the same

league as anything else V, like I think of

other V10s out there.

In terms of what though?

It is, it's quite like a high pitch.

No, then I don't agree with you at all.

I think if you listen to one of the newer

ones, I'm talking like an ACR,

that doesn't sound, like that doesn't sound

old or like calm, that sounds angry and high

pitched and aggressive.

Turbop is great.

I'll watch videos of turbo vipers all day

long at TX2K, wonderful, but yeah,

I didn't have fiber, doesn't really do it for me.

I don't like, don't mind some old,

no, I have an old charger, it's kind of cool.

A barracuda for me, 68.

68 barracuda is one of my things.

Cool names American.

Would you have a Mustang, like a 67,

65 Mustang?

No, not the old ones.

A 69, which is the later one,

so the fastback, the early ones are not it for me.

I like the, whatever the bullet Mustang is,

I like that shape because it doesn't have,

do you know what, I really, really hate,

is the Eleanor Mustang.

I used to be my favorite car on earth.

I just hate it, that is, it's like bad,

not bad, it's not bad, but like Resto Mod

Mustang, it's like too much.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Just a standard Mustang like the bullet one

has got, just nice proportions.

Well, that is, the Eleanor Mustang is

essentially based off the same shape fastback

as a bullet Mustang.

Yeah, but it's the same stuff,

the same stuff.

All over it, yeah, and bumpers and scoot.

GT5 will have a rear.

But yeah, an older, more classic one is,

I think they're starting to look quite nice

to me, but I don't think I'd own one.

Would you have anything, 'cause I would quite

like, this may go against everything we stand for.

Just, not even, doesn't even have to be fast,

or like particularly exciting,

just an old like, nice, sea restore,

Ford, '60s, '70s American car,

but I just cruise around in.

The truth down some, yeah, you're talking

like, not even like, I want to go quickly,

don't necessarily sound big,

just chill.

Yeah, I like it.

These are things I like, but I don't think I

would ever own.

Yeah, so the Cadillac we had,

I always thought, if that was really,

really nice, like clean, as in it didn't have

holes in the floor, and you were cruising

around in the U.S., I could maybe get it.

It's a novelty, almost rental car spec,

where you would, it's great for one or two

days a year.

Yeah, for me, an American car only exists on

Earth to do burnouts and ridiculous

quarter-mile times, and that's it.

I can't, I can't subscribe to,

I can maybe subscribe to early 2000s,

Cadillac Escalade, EXT, Dubwheels,

silly stuff like that.

But in reality, I want to go faster,

I don't want anything.

I don't have a third one.

Okay, so Ben, you're a bit of a tangent,

but those are your one of the week?

Well, do you guys, that was my one of the week?

Yeah, my one of the week isn't American.

Well, I still, still been looking at health

counts, but they're just too expensive here.

So Tom, enjoy it, mate.

Yeah, it's fine.

I'll just not own one.

I was looking again at Gallardo's.

And I find it closer to that,

but I find it closer to Gallardo.

There's a few manual ones for sale.

I have a, I have a, I have a deep-rooted fear

that I, that the boat will be missed eventually.

I think that's likely as well.

I don't think it's soon.

No, I think you've got a couple of years yet,

but I think it will happen.

But I think they are getting fewer,

fewer and further between.

But they're just great.

And every time I look at one,

and then I need, I have to go and watch

videos of, and the noise they make is ridiculous.

And the interiors are a bit naff now.

Yeah, but it cares when you've got five lit,

when you've got that noise.

But it's just a bit, it's just very naff.

It's at that age where it's not,

it's not classic.

It just looks like an old Audi in there.

Like the steering wheel's old Audi,

the center console bit's nice.

It's got nice seats and whatever.

But a manual yellow, Gallardo,

it's black leather.

That's the guy.

Also, the prices are all over the place.

Oh yeah, they're crazy.

Yeah.

There was one option I can't remember,

but it was sold for like 5060K and it was an SE.

And then, but then some people they have them

listed for sale for 7080K because it's manual.

So I don't actually know what the,

what the going rate is for what people are

actually paying for a glove.

There was also, there's one for sale that has

the glass rear hatch.

I don't really like that.

And I saw the other day, just driving,

I mean, I forgot to tell you,

I was driving along on the way to work and a

Balboni Galardo came through.

Wow.

That was like a growing up.

I don't know why that version over any other one.

That's a second gen.

It's a fit.

Yeah, facelift.

Yeah.

There's a facelift, Balboni.

Yeah, it's a fit.

Yeah.

Real will drive with the Super Ligero style wheels.

Yeah.

That, oh, that's just cool.

That's a cool thing.

James May.

And Richard Hammond.

Was it the hot air balloon and the Balboni?

Yeah.

Top.

Yeah.

I'm fairly sure that's what I want.

I think you're right.

Yes, I believe you're right.

Yeah.

I don't know why.

That's a really small section,

not small, but not very well.

Just a little quick race.

Because it was a Lamborghini Balboni,

I was like, hell.

That's a cool man.

Yeah, Balboni.

Yeah.

It's a Valentino Balboni.

But yeah, Gallardo's up there and a Hellcat.

Two really sensible forks.

Two very similar cars.

I don't know what my line is.

As I said last week, I bought the Evo 1 and I

haven't actually seen it yet still.

Still needs to come get transported down.

So I'm just kind of, I'm on that.

I'm excited about that.

I've been looking at wheels.

I

1:08:12 American Cars and Future Plans

potentially need to go and buy some wheels.

Haven't seen the car yet.

Nice.

So, you know, it's what you do.

Yeah.

It was the other thing.

There was something else.

I think it

was, it was Terminator Cobra Mustang.

I keep, look, I keep,

what, what is that?

So it is a SN95.

So this is the '80s Mustang.

So it's an early 2000s off.

So there's a facelift.

So it's called a kind of, so you have the

SN95 and you have the new edge.

So here you go.

So a new edge.

That's what it's called.

So here you go.

Here, I will put up on the screen.

This is called an SN95 Mustang.

All that's rough.

Right.

And then you have, after that,

they, they had what's called

a new edge, which was basically a...

Look at what that's doing.

Look at what that car is doing.

This is the body roll around that corner.

This is a facelift of that kind of same sort of thing.

This is in my head that this shape,

what I'm not looking at now is what I would

have in gaming have been noticed as an SVT Cobra shape.

Exactly.

So a Terminator Cobra is the same sort of

thing as an SVT Cobra, but it had the 4.6

engine, the modular.

So same thing as a Crown Victoria,

that sort of stuff.

Or a limo.

Or a limo.

It had a supercharged version of one of those

and they are simply, I just love them.

Is this standard or is this more?

The wheels are not standard.

The wheels are not standard,

but other than that, the front bumper,

all that is standard.

Wow.

And there is, I forget what it's got.

I think it's called Fire Red.

I forget.

And they sold that like that?

Yes.

Yeah, no, no.

That's just what they look like.

So here we go.